The Swimdow

Spend enough time there, and the wilderness will offer you rare glimpses into the world that used to be, dare I say, even a world that should be. Contrary to the cliches, this world is not quiet and tranquil; it is a world full of movement and constant activity. There is the breeze whooshing through the tree canopy, the scampers of woodland creatures, the whistles and yips of the birds overhead, the babbling brooks, and the SPLASH!

Yes, the splash. It’s an unmistakable sign of the natural phenomenon known to marine biologists and the aqua-enthusiasts around the world as the aquarious plungeotheus. Translated literally from its fake Latin origins, aquarious plungeotheus means “water plunge time.” More recently, the citizen scientist community has adopted the shorthand name, “the Swimdow,” i.e one’s window of opportunity to swim.

Like many of mother nature’s most majestic experiences, the Swimdow is not acquired or gained by materials means. Instead the Swimdow simply appears to those most worthy, those most respectful of and in tune with the wilderness’ free flowing movements of time and space. It cannot be manufactured by man, only mystically conjured into equal parts of the ideal air temperature, water temperature, and ambiance. Then, as quickly as it opens, the Swimdow can close right on your skinny dippin’ toosh! Leaving the swimmer high and…well…wet.

Among the many hours and days and months we spent in the great outdoors I was able to witness the Swimdow first hand. It is a sight to behold. Beautiful and exhilarating, most frequently manifesting as a tall, slender, bearded man smiling and hooting, the Swimdow is a breathtaking sight. (Queue David Attenburrough voice) And here, for the first time ever seen outside of its native habitat deep in the woods, a glimpse of an actual Swimdow! Caught on film with moderately sophisticated smart phone technology, each step of the Swimdow has been documented, showcasing this remarkable natural wonder to inspire the imaginations of even the driest couch-dweller.