Um,dinosaurs.
Maybe it’s the humidity? Do you think it was humid in the pre-historic age? Is that why animals like alligators, manatees, and armadillos thrive in the South? We encountered all of these creatures, animals I am certain swam or walked throughout the earth with T-rexes and somehow survived the giant asteroid! We encountered them, where? Yes, in the humid environs of Florida and Louisiana.
It’s not just the look of these things. I mean, yeah, you can look at any one of these beings and know intuitively that their scales and their shells, their big snouts, all of these things were meant for a different time. A time where Pangea was the only land mass floating around; a time when evolution was still deciding if arms should be super tiny or if legs were really necessary. But more than looks it’s clear that alligators, manatees and armadillos are from a past, more treacherous time because they share one quality - people are their only predators.
Think about it.
Why do you think manatees are so eager to play with Floridian tourists in kayaks and water wings? Probably because we look ridiculously friendly compared to whatever Jurassic shark whale was chasing them down in their past lives!
There’s a “Crocs” joke somewhere in here, but somehow I sense the alligators of the world would be mad at me, and that’s not a grudge I’m trying to inspire. The only thing alligators have to worry about any more is being turned into gator bites or a pair of boots for the next Joe Exotic out there. It took a mere 3 minutes after checking into our Florida-based airbnb before the local alligator made his presence known, peering just above the water line with his piercing black eyes as if to say - say hello to the new world T-rex folks. Needless to say, we opted for the hard bottom kayak instead of the inflatable one.
And the armadillo. Did you know armadillos are basically blind? They just snoop around for grubs with some version of an anteater nose and reverberations from sound. Our campground outside of New Orleans was clearly their homeland, and instead of scurrying away when I shrieked in terror, the stubby, shelled animals were more attracted to me! In spite of their lack of senses, they clearly believe they have nothing to fear except a Ford F-150 as long there are no paradactyls hunting them from the skies.
Mad respect to these and the other dinos that continue to roam the earth. If you can outlive the ice age and the triceratops of past worlds, I promise we’ll do our best to make sure you survive the motor boat propellers of this world.
